Between Worlds

            So today is my last day in Ecuador, and it’s bittersweet. Though I can’t wait to take a warm shower without worrying about it becoming ice cold in .5 seconds or losing the water halfway through, and though I can’t wait to eat some pop tarts and have the beach only an hour away, I’m also going to seriously miss this country, these people, and this life here. I always feel like I’m in between worlds here, and it sucks. At times I’m blessed to have two homes, two families, and two languages to call my own, but at the same time, it becomes such a burden when I have to choose between them. I don’t like having to go back and forth to these houses. I don’t like getting to have brothers and a sister for only a few short months. I don’t like mixing up my English and my Spanish or having to choose whether to watch a movie in one or the other. But honestly, this is my life. I have another family and a boyfriend overseas, and this is what it’s like to have that. I just hope that one day I’ll be able to balance it, but I’m pretty sure we’re going to end up going back and forth for our entire lives, and at some point, I think I’ll be okay with it. I’m at least thankful for it. Honestly, I probably wouldn’t have it any other way…

            Well, this will be my last entry before I come back to America. It’s been quite a ride here. It’s been emotional, fun, hard, and wonderful. I’ve enjoyed so much these last (almost) three months, and, on the bright side, I’m excited to go home and see friends, have my birthday party, and try to figure out my life for this semester, aka finding an internship (which I’m actually not really excited for). Before I do those things, let me tell you about what you’ve missed while I’ve been gone.

            So three days out of last week I had worship practice with Cristian and Marty, who were going to do worship with me. I was really pleased with our practices, as we got so much done, and I could see our improvements (and even my own) each time. It made me realize how important practice and planning ahead is, even if it doesn’t go exactly as planned. So it was pretty enjoyable, and we were ready for Sunday!

            Before practice on Friday we went to San Antonio to get shawarma, which isn’t as good here as at the beach, but it was still good! I also got to eat dinner with Santy’s family. We were going to have church, but only one person showed up, so we ended up just going home.

            On Saturday we got up to make brunch for the family. I had to use the rest of my pancakes, so we made the whole family pancakes, eggs, and cut up fruit. They loved it, and I loved getting to eat brunch with my family. Once brunch was over, I watched Santy play Blokus with the twins, then I played. It was so much fun! I won (using all but one piece), then Santy won. If you haven’t played, look it up. It’s a lot of fun.

            Then we just relaxed for a bit before getting ready to make yet another meal for the family. I invited our friend Katelynn over, as we haven’t gotten to hang out with her. So we got to talk while we cooked. We made tacos for dinner and apple crisp for dessert. Both turned out wonderful, and we all ended up full! We had a buffet-like set up, with bowls of cheese, tomatoes, lettuce, sour cream, and meat. Everyone had at least two tacos each! More than that, I really enjoyed spending time with my family and talking, eating, and laughing together. And so my mom and my sister know this, I was the one to clean ALL of the dishes ALL day (and I can tell you, in a family of 5, and having eaten dinner with a total of 8 people, it was a lot).

            Sunday was probably the most exciting day, though. On Sunday I had to be at church early so I could set up sound and everything to lead worship. Everything was ready to go: the guitar, the power point, and all of us! As I mentioned before, Cristian was playing the djembe, while Martita was helping me sing (and her voice is much like mine!). I was super nervous, as I had to transition two out of the five songs by talking, and I’d never spoken Spanish officially to that many people before. I’m one to public speak, but when it comes to a language I’m not great in, I’m pretty shaky. I was also nervous to lead worship, as I hadn’t played guitar in a church for a while, and when I have, I don’t think I was “good enough” at doing it. Needless to say, I had a lot going through my mind.

            So around 10:45 people started piling in, and it was time to do probably the most terrifying but most rewarding thing of my life. I got to sing worship with this Ecuadorian church, and it was wonderful. They all sang so loud and passionately in the small space we were in. It wouldn’t have mattered how I sang or played because they probably overpowered Marty and I. Either way, they enjoyed it, and I could feel the emotion in the room, especially as we played “I Could Sing of Your Love Forever” and “Rescue” (great songs). I got tongue-tied sometimes when I spoke, but it went well, and I even had Marty read a verse for one of the songs. It probably couldn’t have gone better, and I was so happy to be able to worship with Santy’s church family in such a cool way! (and yes, Mom, don’t worry, I have videos).

            Cristian ended the worship with a prayer, which he beautifully delivered. He even mentioned his “beautiful cousin who came to share time with us for a few months and then sing for us”. It was such a blessing.

            Once church ended Santy and I went to San Antonio to get shawarma for lunch. We ate in the restaurant then went to Quito, where we were going to go to the park, but it ended up raining. We were also going to ride horses, but it wasn’t a good day for it, so I’ll have to wait until next year. Instead we walked around the mall and looked at all the cute (but extremely expensive) stores before having dinner at, you guessed it- Pizza Hut! I can’t get enough of their pepperoni panned pizza! We then got dessert at KFC, which, for me, was a waffle bowl with oreo ice cream and M&M’s! For Santy it was, of course, strawberry ice cream on a cone.

            Monday Santy and I decided to spend a whole day just spending time with each other, as today is going to be spent with just my family. Unfortunately his family is all gone to El Refugio, as an awesome camp is going on this week. So today I’m spending today only with my family.

            So Monday we went to San Antonio to pick up my backpack (fixed zipper, woohoo) and then Condado to buy some drinks and food. Then we watched movies all day, pigged out, played games, and just hung out together. It was a great day.

            Today will be spent giving gifts to both Santy and to my family, as well as giving Santy the shells and letters I’ve prepared for certain friends here. I plan on finishing most of my food and hopefully being able to pack all my stuff into one bag so I can use my guitar as a check in (if you ever fly to Ecuador, don’t take LAN; worst airline ever). I’m also going to El Refugio to say bye to a lot of people and hopefully fly our kites!

            I also forgot to mention that I’ve been trying to get Santy “caught up” with American culture, so we borrowed movies from Jim and Susie. We watched “Blind Side” (which he teared up watching) and “The Breakfast Club”, and he has successfully named that classic to be one of his favorite movies. I couldn’t be prouder.

            Yup, those have been my last few days in Ecuador. They’ve been such a blessing, as this whole trip has been. God has taught me a lot about myself and who I want to be, and I feel like I’ve changed a bit, too. I’ve gotten a lot of rest and a lot of clarity here, as well as experiences and memories that will definitely last me until I (hopefully) come back next year. Until then, read Santy’s blog (http://santiagoandallieinamerica.blogspot.com) in December when Santy comes for three months and then read this again in a year when I’m hopefully here for a longer period of time.

            Thanks for keeping up with my adventures, and hopefully one day this will be a bigger part of my life than it is right now. As I’ve heard a million times before, goodbyes are hard, but you have to say goodbye before you can say hello again. Here’s to leaving one world and going into the next.

            Until next time… ¡adios, amigos!